• HeartShips
  • Posts
  • Healing is a journey. You’ve heard that before, right?

Healing is a journey. You’ve heard that before, right?

The problem is, we forget it as soon as we hit a setback. Suddenly it feels like you’re back at square one. All the work you put in seems worthless, and frustration takes over.

At least, that’s how I felt during my most recent setback. If we called it “training” instead of a setback, the experience would have a very different quality. And as the saying goes, “Life will keep presenting you with the same problem until you’ve solved it.” I had to go through this to understand the next layer of what life wanted to reveal to me.

What do frustration over your status quo, fear of your own feelings, fighting, trying to fix, and obsessing over your problems have in common? They all perpetuate the emotional state.

True and radical acceptance of what is—that’s the only way to deal with unpleasant emotions. Combine this with what I call “speaking to your nervous system,” and you have a game changer, especially for highly sensitive people.

Sensitive people literally feel their nervous systems light up like a Christmas tree whenever they have an unpleasant thought and engage with it. That’s why managing your thoughts and making sure you use the right words when speaking to yourself is crucial.

You might say, “I don’t talk to myself!”—but that’s not true. You just don’t listen. Watch your thoughts closely and you’ll be shocked by how brutally you judge yourself.

If you’re not highly sensitive, you might not feel it in your body, but your body always keeps the score. None of your bodily ailments is disconnected from your mind or the way you see the world. There is no separation between body and mind.

No matter who you are, you’ll feel the difference between certain thoughts. Try it yourself: listen to a sad song while it’s dark and rainy outside and imagine your life going down the drain. Then put on a happy song, dance to it, and imagine how magical and wonderful life could be—even if nothing around you looks that way.

If a coffee can wake you up and give you a good feeling, your thoughts can work miracles if you learn how to use them. You’ve probably heard this a million times, but I urge you to try it daily.

The key is twofold:
One part is non-engagement with distressing thoughts. The other is focusing on constructive thinking and finding the right words that light up your system.

For example: if you have a distressing thought, first acknowledge it. Then label it as just a thought (not your thought!), or even better, see it as your nervous system trying to keep you safe. Accept the situation, and then refocus on whatever you were doing. If you’re lying in bed, just lie there and watch your breath. If you’re at work, focus on your work. If you’re out for a walk, keep walking.

The second step is to find the words and images that make you feel good about life. If you practice, you’ll notice the nuances. If I tell myself, “I accept that feeling,” nothing happens—because it means the feeling is allowed to stay, but I don’t truly want it. If I say, “I welcome this emotion with love,” my system lights up, and I become softer.

This softness is what Dr. Claire Weekes describes as “floating.” Floating on your distressing emotions is the key to acceptance. It means being okay with whatever happens, not fearing it. It’s a softening in the eyes, the face, the body—and, most importantly, in your thoughts.

We have everything we need to be happy inside us. It really is up to us to activate that power; we just haven’t learned how. Instead, we fixate on our problems and create the very opposite of what we want.

You don’t need to believe in manifestation to understand that you’re not perceiving reality as it is, but as you are. Next time you feel down, call it “training day,” and remember: this is not a punishment, but an opportunity to make the best out of life.

follow heart.ships on Instagram!

Before You Go...

If you're enjoying this newsletter, I would greatly appreciate your support. Please consider sharing it with a friend or colleague who may benefit from some motivation and inspiration. Thank you!

My mission

My mission is to empower people to discover their true selves by freeing them from the mental and social constraints that hold them back, and to assist them in becoming their best selves.

FREE ebooks

Dive Deeper with a Coaching

On my journey through the dark night of the soul I had many great teachers and mentors on my side. I spent thousands of Euros (and still do) on coachings and every cent was worth it. I don't think I would have been able to turn my life around so quickly without the help of these amazing people. The value you are receiving from working on removing emotional blocks, limiting beliefs and toxic thinking, can't be measured in money.

Most people only need 6 sessions in 3 months to generate dramatic outcomes in their lives. It's not like I teach them new things or have a bullet proof process. Quite the opposite is true. I believe that structure and process can help, but in most cases you're limiting life and all of its wonderful ways to create miracles for you. I am working on an intuitive level and combine all of my experience and knowledge from freeing myself.

What my clients are saying about working with me

Clara, Startup Founder: "Through his own very real ordeal and great listening skills I felt understood and that he was able to level with me in a way that felt authentic and unlike other help I’d previously sought in this area. I was inspired to pursue my own happiness (not overnight) and today can say, nearly two years on, living in a different country with a life full of love and running my own company - doing something I love - I’m really glad we met."

Felix, Startup Founder: "Jan is an extraordinary human being and an outstanding coach. Through our coaching, he helps me tremendously with personal growth and always has practical guidance at his hand."

Zahid, Startup Founder: "Jan is an incredible listener. Through several conversations with him, I have gotten a huge amount of clarity about where I’m looking to go with my business, and how I can overcome personal and professional challenges."

💡 High performance demands deep nourishment.
For years, I pushed through stress, anxiety, brain fog, and low energy — thinking I could outwork it all. But behind the scenes, my gut was inflamed, my brain running on fumes, and my body depleted. It wasn’t until I got serious about root causes — fixing my digestion, calming my nervous system, and supporting myself with the right supplements — that things shifted. Magnesium, omega-3s, a high-quality B-complex, and targeted gut support became non-negotiables. If you’re a high performer, don’t wait until burnout hits. Test yourself. Fuel yourself. And give your system what it actually needs to thrive.

👉 Check out my personal list of foundational supplements — science-backed essentials I recommend to everyone who wants to perform and feel their best.