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The Voices That Live Inside You: On Morning Pages
“Fucking morning pages. Who do you think you are? Scribbling a few words on paper and believing you can save the world with that. Pathetic. Heaven, ass, and twine! By the seven hellhounds!”
That’s how one of my morning pages began. Not with gentle reflection. Not with gratitude. Not with any sense of higher purpose. It came out as a barked command, the kind of scolding you’d hear on a storm-tossed deck.
It wasn’t exactly my voice. It was the voice of the old sailor in me — the inner captain from Hamburg’s harbor. A man forged in salt air and hard labor. The kind of voice that values sweat, discipline, and survival over softness. In his world, work is hauling ropes until your palms are raw, not scribbling words in a notebook. He measures worth in calluses, not in reflections.
And yet there he was, alive on the page.
This is what happens when you sit down to do what Julia Cameron calls “morning pages” in The Artist’s Way: three longhand pages of stream of consciousness, written first thing in the morning. They aren’t meant to be art. They aren’t meant to be published. They are simply a space where the mind is allowed to spill — unfiltered, unedited, unashamed.
And when you let yourself spill, you quickly discover: there’s more than one voice in you.
The Captain
For me, the first voice is often the captain. He comes out swinging, cynical and uncompromising, reminding me that writing is “not real work,” that life is serious, and that my efforts on the page are indulgent at best, pathetic at worst.
It’s not pleasant to meet him there. But that’s the point. Morning pages are not about silencing these voices — they are about letting them surface. On paper, they stop lurking in the background. They become visible. And once visible, they start to change.
The Teacher
Because if I keep writing, if I don’t stop when the captain spits his curses, something remarkable happens. The voice shifts. The tone softens.
“We are safe here on paper, because this is the place where everything comes together. All that steers you from the depths, without you even noticing. These energies are not here to block you, but to bring lessons, to shape your character. Integration, not denial, is what makes you whole.”
Suddenly I’m not being whipped forward by the captain anymore. I’m being guided by a teacher. The same energy that condemned me is now trying to shape me.
This softer voice reminds me that even my inner critic has a purpose. That these rough energies are not enemies, but lessons in disguise. They demand to be acknowledged. Deny them, and they only grow louder. Let them speak, and they transform into something else.
The Desert
And then, still writing, another image arises — not quite a voice this time, but a metaphor.
“These voices are nothing but wind across a desert. They shift the dunes, they redraw the landscape. The desert itself remains, but the forms are always changing. If you try to cement the dunes in place, afraid to move with them, you cut yourself off from life. But when you let them wander, they uncover what was buried, they create new worlds.”
That line stayed with me.
The dunes are my thoughts, my moods, my inner voices. Always moving, reshaping, never final. The desert beneath them is my deeper self: vast, still, unbroken. Morning pages showed me that I am not the storm, not the dunes, not even the restless winds that move them. I am the desert that holds them all.
Why This Practice Matters
Morning pages are not about producing something beautiful. They are about discovering what is already moving inside you. The critic. The cynic. The dreamer. The mystic. The wounded child. The wise elder. They all live in us, and most days they clamor over each other, fighting for attention.
On paper, they can finally be heard — one after another. And as they speak, you begin to notice patterns. You start to distinguish the voices of fear from the whispers of truth. Some are just storms blowing sand. Others are winds that reshape the landscape, revealing what was hidden.
Writing in this way is an act of trust. You don’t know which voice will appear when you sit down. Some mornings it will be ugly, bitter, self-pitying. Other mornings it will feel like a prayer. But with time, you learn that even the harshest voices soften when they are given the space to exist.
Prayer Without Religion
For me, morning pages became a kind of prayer. Not to any god in particular, but to life itself. Because just as feelings want to be felt, thoughts want to be thought. When I give them space, I heal.
It is a healing that doesn’t come from silencing or suppressing, but from listening and allowing. The way meditation teaches you to let thoughts float by without clinging, morning pages teach you to let thoughts pour out until they reveal their deeper current.
And sometimes, if you stay with it long enough, that current carries you into places you never expected — deserts, dunes, winds, voices of sailors, voices of saints.
The Gift
Morning pages are not therapy, not literature, not productivity hacks. They are something far more subtle and profound: a dialogue with the hidden chorus of your own mind.
They remind you that all these voices are part of you — but none of them define you. You are the desert, not the dune. You are the one who holds all of them.
And in the end, the most important lesson morning pages teach is this: you don’t need to silence your inner critics. You just need to keep writing until another voice rises.
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